


Are We Growing Up, Or Just Going Down?

by Anonymous



Category: Glee
Genre: Coming of Age, Eventual Smut, Friends to Lovers, Kids to Teens to Adults, M/M, Sexual Experimentation, Starts G but Increases to E in Later Chapters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-06
Updated: 2016-01-23
Packaged: 2018-05-12 04:16:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 7
Words: 12,893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5652109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For the prompt 'Puck and Finn's relationship told through a series of sleepovers, from their first one at age 8 through their first night in the dorm together.' This is just that. A series of sleepovers that explain how best friends can turn into partners in crime can turn into experimentation can turn into love. Took a step outside of my usual pairings for this one, but I rather like it, and I hope you do too!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Age 8

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [GleePromptMeme](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/GleePromptMeme) collection. 



> **Prompt:**
> 
>  
> 
> Puck and Finn's relationship told through a series of sleepovers, from their first one at age 8 through their first night in the dorm together.

It's a Friday night when their moms finally say 'yes' and on Saturday morning Finn is up so much earlier than usual that Carole might just fall over from shock. "Finn, honey, are you sick?" she asks, and he just shakes his head and grins so hugely that she feels her heart stutter in her chest. Oh, to be so young and happy again...

 

To be fair, Finn isn't always so happy. He took his dad leaving hard, even though he didn't really know the guy since he was pretty young then, but he still feels it, and Carole knows that. So seeing her boy like this, so pleased, so excited, it warms her heart.

 

"Puck's coming over today!" he shouts, and bounces around the kitchen while she tries to get some cereal into a bowl with milk without him upsetting it. Someday she and Ruth will figure out why Noah is so adamant about not being called by his first name, but for now, 'Puck' is a cute enough nickname and she can't really say much. 'Finn' isn't a very usual name either, in all honesty.

 

She smiles and Finn chows down on his Frosted Flakes, then runs around like a mad man calling out all the things he wants to do that night. His friend isn't even due to come over for another four hours at least, but Finn's too excited to wait. He's too pumped up to be patient. Carole picks up the phone only an hour later and dials Ruth.

 

"Yours up and about already, too?" she asks, getting an affirmative from the end of the line. Ruth sounds exasperated, and Carole can hear Sarah putting up a hell of a fuss. She still can't believe Ruth's husband left her with a baby and an eight-year-old... At least she was only left to struggle with one baby. At least she didn't have a handful and a half to deal with when her dream turned into a nightmare... "Might as well bring him over, then. They'll play all day and night. You know them. I don't think they're capable of getting tired of each other."

 

It takes about an hour for Ruth to show up, Sarah in her arms and Noah bouncing along beside them, running up to the house he loved to play at. "Sorry, Carole. I had to get all his things packed and then the baby needed fed and changed and... you know how it is. Get one thing together and the rest all falls apart."

 

Carole smiles, nods, invites her friend in and they go to the kitchen where she makes some coffee and they relax, Sarah in her carrier that Ruth brings in from the car. They pass the time together, two women making it work, making life work for them despite the things they've been through and the shit hand they've been dealt. Having each other is a blessing, and both are very thankful for that.

 

The boys don't understand the troubles their moms face, but they do understand that they both don't have dads and that's stupid, but at least they can relate. At such a young age, kids don't really understand when you say "I don't have a daddy," or "my dad left us," or any other variation of the story, so they both generally don't say anything, and it just gets... awkward. Puck gets angry and pushes people. Finn just gets lonely and kinda sad.

 

That's why they have each other. So they don't get so angry or sad. They can always talk to each other about how they wish they had a dad to go to that fishing competition thing at the Ohio river they hold each year, or how they'd join the boy scout troop if they didn't have to go with their moms, cause who brings a mom to a boys only thing? That's stupid.

 

Finn isn't supposed to call things 'stupid' but he does when he's with Puck, because Puck calls things 'stupid' and Puck's cool and Finn wants to be cool, too. Puck's his best friend, and Finn wants to be just like him. Finn doesn't want Puck to think he's not cool enough and not hang out with him anymore. He doesn't want Puck to leave like his dad did.

 

He's so excited about this sleepover though! Nobody could mess this up. He has it all planned and it's gonna be perfect, and they can start now, but instead of doing the inside stuff now, he really thinks they should go outside because it's really nice out and they won't be able to play outside later when it gets dark and they have  _all day_  and  _all night_  this time and how cool is that?

 

"Puck! Let's go out back and play pirates!" he squeals, running for the back door with Puck on his heels. They like playing pirates, because Finn's yard has this great tree that loses branches and they make the  _best_  swords and there's this old sand box that they pretend to wash up on when they're shipwrecked and they jump off the swings to pretend they're falling off the plank. It's so much fun.

 

Slapping a hand over his eye, Puck grins at Finn and say "arr, matey!" and Finn laughs so hard he falls over. "Ye dare laugh at me? I'll gut ya!" And Puck's lunging at him with a fallen tree limb and Finn's rolling and laughing and dodging but he still gets poked a few times in the gut and he just laughs harder.

 

They duel with their branches until it's time for lunch, noticing that Ruth and Sarah are gone and Carole has made some PB&J's for them. Finn smiles and munches happily, while Puck grins just as wide. "Thanks, Mrs. H!" he says after taking a bite. "You even remembered not to use grape!"

 

Their moms know both of them like their own kids, as if Puck and Finn were brothers, and it's nice. In that way, no matter which house they're at, both boys always feel loved and cared for. That's how Carole and Ruth know there won't be any midnight phone calls of homesickness and fear. The kids are as good as home when they're at each other's houses. It's... nice. It's really nice.

 

After lunch, they run back outside and start a construction zone in a patch of dirt and rocks. They use Finn's bright yellow Tonka trucks to move the earth, each different truck doing a different job that ultimately does the same thing- digs a big hole that Carole will have to fill in later. They have fun pretending to be construction workers, though, building a road or digging a pit or any number of stories. They like getting dirty and working with their hands. They like working together, too.

 

They play like that until it's close to dinner time and the sun starts to set, then Finn gets up and brushes the dirt off his knees. "Hey, Puck, wanna build our fort now?" he asks, and Puck agrees, wiping his hands on his pants and kicking the dirt from his shoes before running into the house after his best friend.

 

When Carole sees them, she yells that they better get cleaned up and into some pjs so she can wash those clothes in the morning, and they race to Finn's bedroom where Puck's bag is stashed. Once there, they grab some pjs and head to the bathroom, sharing space by the sink and each grabbing a washcloth, stripping to their underwear and cleaning all the dirt from their arms and legs and hands and... feet?

 

"How does dirt get inside our socks?" Puck asks, sitting on the floor and looking utterly perplexed. Finn shrugs and keeps scrubbing until he's pretty sure he's at least mostly clean. It'll do.

 

"C'mon! I wanna make the fort!" Finn whines when Puck takes forever to get dressed, and once they've both got their Ninja Turtle pjs on (they match, because they both asked for them for Christmas and Carole and Ruth went shopping together) they leave their dirty stuff in the bathroom and run to Finn's room and grab every blanket in sight.

 

Downstairs, they get all the throw blankets, afghans, quilts, and heavy blankets that happen to be around the living room and hidden in storage areas, and they go to town. The fort stays up thanks to the entertainment system- aka the giant wooden monstrosity made for way more electronics than the Hudsons will ever own, and the support of the couch and chairs in the room. It's huge and ridiculous and literally takes up the entire room. They've confiscated all the pillows, too, and there are sleeping bags and the blankets not used in the actual fort-making inside on the floor for sleeping in.

 

The boys sit proudly in the middle, flashlights between them acting as their campfire. Finn thinks it was pretty genius of him to include the TV in their fort so they can watch movies later on, and Puck thinks it's pretty cool that they aren't getting in trouble for wrecking the living room. Finn's mom is pretty awesome.

 

Making the fort was hard work, and the hotdogs and mac'n'cheese aren't ready yet, so the boys just hide out in the fort and relax for a while. Finn lays down and Puck plays with one of the flashlights, flicking it on and off in his eyes, going blind for split seconds and wondering what it would be like if the blackness didn't actually fade and he couldn't see again.

 

"I hate school..." Finn says, and Puck nods in agreement. Everyone knows they aren't the smartest kids in their class. Puck gets frustrated and lashes out when he doesn't get something the first time and Finn, well, Finn just has a hard time grasping things. People don't get that. It makes it ten times harder and when you're a kid, school is already an encumbrance to your play time.

 

Puck looks over at him and sighs. "Me too. School sucks. I mean, why can't we just stay home and play? Who needs to know stuff that happened a hundred years ago or stupid math or those science things we did with the leaf collecting last week?" Puck rolls his eyes and Finn laughs. It's all so true. Who needs to study leaves when they play in them all the time? He's seen plenty of leaves. Doesn't mean he needs to know what kind of tree they came from.

 

"Cartoons are way better anyways," Puck continues. "They teach us way more than school. Look at Pokémon! Teaches you how to fight with monsters and what kind of attack does more damage against what. Like fire's weak to water and that stuff, you know?" Finn's nodded and Puck looks happy.

 

He goes on to talk about how the baby shows like Dora and Diego and whatever else his mom puts on for his baby sister who can't even watch TV yet are teaching kids Spanish. "Ma tries to say I should watch it but that's baby stuff. I'm not watching that. Maybe if the Power Rangers started teaching me Spanish I'd learn it..."

 

Finn's laughing again and agreeing, again, and it's just fun. He loves hanging out with his best friend. "I heard some of the older boys talking about girls on the bus yesterday," Finn mentions, getting up and shifting around to play with the other flashlight. He's not sure why he wants to talk about this, but it seemed important and he just want to make sure. He doesn't want to be the only one who feels like girls are just... ew.

 

"Girls? Why would you waste your time on them? Girls are just gross and annoying and trouble. That's what my dad used to say before he took off, I remember. And they smell funny and are always talking in those high voices and  _giggling_." He shuddered and Finn grinned.

 

Of course Puck would be on the same wavelength as him. Of course he would. This was perfect. "Yeah! I don't know why anyone would waste their time on silly stupid girls!" he says, and he uses 'stupid' again just to boost his pride, even though he's pretty sure his mom could have heard that and he'll probably get scolded after Puck leaves tomorrow.

 

They're called to dinner then, and they practically inhale the meal. Finn laughs mid-chew and gets mac'n'cheese up his nose, which makes Puck howl with laughter while Carole has Finn blowing chunks of cheddar noodles out of his nose into a napkin. Soon, they're back in the fort with a box of matchbox cars, a bag of chips, some soda in no-spill cups (which were the best purchases Ruth and Carole ever made) and a few movies ready to watch. Before they even decide what to do first, Puck grabs a piece of fabric from his pants pocket, because the pjs came with face masks of course, and ties it around his head, the holes barely lining up so he can see.

 

"I call dibs on Raff!" he yells, hopping up into a ninja-stance.

 

Finn's quick to dig into his own pocket, searching around the couple pieces of candy and Lego men to find his favorite mask. The blue fabric floats through the air as he fumbles to tie it in place. "I'm Leonardo, of course."

 

Even though Puck argues that Finn would make a better Mikey, they proceed to fight their way through invisible battles, on their way to face the evil Shredder. By the time they've won that ultimate fight, it's getting late and they're worn out, so they fall back on the mound of pillows they've collected and Puck opens the bag of chips.

 

"Go put a movie in!" he commands, and Finn does so with a groan, shoving Shrek into the player and starting it up. The pair watch in delight as the ogre and donkey ham it up on the screen. They laugh at the farting and burping and general grossness of the movie, then get disgusted when Fiona and Shrek get all lovey-dovey. Finn sticks his tongue out and Puck throws a chip at the TV.

 

The boys dig into the chips and soda with a gusto and it's the best time they've ever had! Sleepovers are awesome because who knew there were so few rules enforced during them? They get away with so much- eating more snacks than they should and drinking more soda and staying up late...

 

They play with Finn's cars while the credits roll, dodging fallen chips and folded blankets until they're too tired and Puck decides they should make some s'mores before watching another movie and getting in their sleeping bags.

 

They try to melt the marshmallows on the flashlights like a campfire, but it isn't working and Puck gets bored, so they go to the kitchen and he turns on the stove, only for Carole to come down to check on them and screech about the stove being on and the house burning down.

 

"No using the stove, Noah!" she yells, then helps them use the microwave instead while Finn snickers at Puck for being yelled at and for being called 'Noah' at the same time. That earns him a kick to the shin, so he hops over to make his s'more, but it tastes really good and he soon forgets about the bruise forming on his leg.

 

They take their sugary snacks back to the fort and pop Monsters, Inc. into the player and start it up, then get into their sleeping bags, already yawning. It's been a long day, but both boys are all full of smiles.

 

"Puck?" Finn says, a sleepy grin on his face. When his friend answers, he yawns and continues. "You're my best friend. We're gonna stay best friends always, right?"

 

And Puck smiles so wide, Finn's sure he's the only one who's ever seen such an expression on his friend's face. "Of course, dummy. Best friends forever. And we're gonna have sleepovers every weekend from now on! This is awesome!"

 

Yeah... this is  _awesome_


	2. Age 11

It isn't like eleven is that much different than ten was, but at the same time it's so much different because Finn's in the fifth grade now and that means he's in middle school and that means he's growing up, and growing up is awesome! And Puck's right there with him and they're going to try out for football and basketball and baseball and whatever other ball there is and they're so excited and school has never been fun but now maybe it is a little fun because they are going to be  _cool_.

 

They've had sleepovers with a couple other friends by now, and Dave is kinda fun when you do what he wants to do and Matt's real good at sports, but nobody else is like Finn or Puck. No, they're best friends and none of their other friends are as awesome as them. So they like to spend their weekends at each other's houses, just like they've done since they were eight years old.

 

This weekend, Puck's at Finn's, which is usually what happens as long as Sarah has somewhere to be. They're allowed to be home alone after school until their moms get off work, but Sarah can't be home alone and they have to watch her when she isn't with family or a friend, so sometimes they end up at Puck's house now that their moms trust them with Puck's sister. And, really, Sarah's Finn's sister at this point, too.

 

Coming in after school, the boys toss their backpacks on the chair that used to be Finn's dad's and tromp into the kitchen, heating up some pizza rolls and pulling cans of Monster from the fridge.

 

"I thought your mom banned Monster, dude," Puck says as he pops the tab on his drink, taking a long pull of liquid energy and smacking his lips.

 

Finn grins and nods, voice coming out a little squeaky in patches. His voice started to change the last week and his mom says he's some kind of early bloomer, whatever that means. Finn doesn't really care- he just wants to stop sounding like a chipmunk every other sentence. "She did, but I hid it behind the stacks of lunchables. I still have a bunch left, then I'll just buy more with my allowance."

 

They need their gamer fuel, so Finn will do what it takes to have it on hand. Puck says he'll chip in, and they slap hands then do a little jerk and tug and spin thing that makes up their 'secret bro handshake' they made up. It's nothing too fancy, but it's theirs, and they do it all the time.

 

"Dude, your voice is whack," Puck says with a snort, and Finn shakes his head. His face is turning red, but Puck doesn't comment. "You're gonna sound way different when it's done though, I guess. Wish mine would drop, too. It's not fair you get to sound grown up before me..." And that's Puck's way of giving a compliment, and Finn knows this, so he smiles.

 

"Yeah, well, when you sound like an Alvin and the Chipmunks reject I'll remind you of how awesome it'll eventually be," he promises with a smirk.

 

They take their food and drink to Finn's room and grab the controllers, starting up the Xbox while shoving steaming pizza rolls into their mouths. Of course, Finn burns the roof of his mouth and Puck laughs at him, so Finn throws his shoe at Puck's head. They get into a wrestling match then, and it's a little awkward because there's  _rubbing_  and Finn's pretty sure he feels something against his thigh and then Puck rolls away and Finn knows he's breathing hard and he thinks Puck's breathing hard, too.

 

"Hey, Puck?" he asks, trying to calm the butterflies in his gut. Why does he even have those feelings anyway? It was just some wrestling on his bed. They do that kind of thing all the time...

 

The darker-haired, tan-skinned boy looks over at him and seems to catch his breath. "Yeah?"

 

Finn feels like Puck is the only person he can talk to about any of this kind of stuff. He doesn't have a dad in his life, and who wants to talk to their mom about guy things? It isn't like that's any kind of comfortable... And who else would there be? Doctors? Extended family? Finn doesn't have other family, and his doctor is a pediatrician that his mother knows from work. He's not going to talk about his nightly activities with someone his mom knows personally, thanks.

 

"Have you ever had...  _those_  kind of dreams?" he asks tentatively, and Puck's brow scrunches for a minute, then his eyes clear and he nods a little hesitantly. Finn lets out a sigh of relief and then keeps talking. "I thought I wet the bed, dude. And then I looked on the internet in the middle of the night to figure out what it was. And now it's happening like... every other night. It's ridiculous! And I swear I got a boner in class last week for no reason at all. I don't know what to do!"

 

And now Puck looks a little uncomfortable and shifts, and Finn's pretty sure he knows why, but he isn't going to say anything about what he felt. "I know what you mean," Puck mutters. "I only had my first one of...  _those_  dreams like... a little over a week ago? Dude, how are you experiencing this stuff before me?" And he sounds kind of shocked and kind of disappointed, but not really angry. Just... maybe like he's less? Finn doesn't feel that way though. He wishes someone else was experiencing it before him. Then maybe he wouldn't be so shocked and confused about it all.

 

"It's not very fun, trust me," Finn sulks, playing with the string of his hoodie. The game screen is playing a demo but neither of them is paying any attention. This is one of those subjects that's important, and neither of them have anyone else to really talk to about it all.

 

They talk about how their moms keep asking if they have any questions about their bodies and how they talked about weird stuff like 'hair down there' and hygiene habits and smells and so many other awkward things that they never want to speak to their moms about ever. Puck says that if his mom asks one more time about his washing habits in regards to his balls he's going to freak.

 

Finn points out that he's had a lot of weird discussions about foreskin lately, and that brings them to discussing their own differences in that area since Puck was circumcised like a good Jewish boy. It's an odd conversation, maybe, but it just kind of seems natural for them since they talk about all this stuff all the time.

 

"Mom just keeps talking about how new things can make more messes there and I need to be extra careful and clean and it's like, dude, I already know all this. You don't think weird stuff made that area cruddy before? I'm a  _guy_. Everything about us gets cruddy," he grumbles, and Puck laughs.

 

Sometimes Finn wants to ask what a circumcised penis looks like, cause when they talk about this stuff he wonders, but he doesn't know if that would be too much. He knows they've undressed together and stuff, but he never really  _looked_  cause that seems like crossing some line and... well, he just wonders. But he isn't ready to ask. So he stays quiet and he wonders if maybe his best friend wonders what his foreskin's like, too.

 

They play some Halo and when they decide the pizza rolls weren't enough to fill them up and head for the kitchen to find more food, Puck goes back to the earlier conversation. "So, what are your dreams about? You know, when you have  _those_  dreams."

 

It's an offhand sort of question, but it's kinda loaded and Finn doesn't really know what to say. He's a little hazy as to what he dreams about, but he's pretty sure he knows what he's  _supposed_  to dream about and he doesn't think that's actually what he does dream about, so he doesn't really know how to answer the question and he's  _nervous_  and he's stuttering and...

 

"Well, I mean, I dunno..." he says, pulling a package of Lil' Smokies out of the fridge and a big bag of Lays from the cupboard. They'll end up ordering a pizza later, probably, but it's still kinda early and Finn's pretty sure his mom will want some pizza, too, so he'll just make this stuff work for now. They grab more Monsters and start for the stairs. "I guess there's people and touching and... It just feels good?"

 

He's pretty sure he has some idea of who the main person is in his dreams, but it's not supposed to be your best friend who makes you feel that way. It's supposed to be girls or something, cause girls aren't so gross anymore even if Finn isn't sure exactly  _why_  that is, and he just... Argh. None of what he feels or thinks is right and it's all difficult and Finn doesn't want to worry about it anymore.

 

"Dude, I had one about Santana..." Puck says, and Finn groans. Puck and Santana have gone back and forth since elementary school. It's kind of ridiculous, really. The girl has a temper on her like fire and she doesn't deal well with anyone, especially Puck and his attitude. He picked on her once when she brought a doll to school, so she punched him in the nose. Gave him a nose bleed and he had to go home early and Santana got detention. Finn never understood what Puck saw in the girl, but he was kind of friends with her ever since.

 

Finn shakes his head and opens the sausages, popping one in his mouth and chewing, talking while he eats. "Of course you did. Did she punch you and that made you come?" he asks, using the term for the first time. It feels weird on his tongue, but he found it in his internet search and he knows that's what happens and... well, he can talk this way with Puck. His ears are totally red and his heart's beating fast, but still. He can say stuff like this with his best friend and not feel completely weird.

 

"Shut up," Puck mumbles and unpauses the game before Finn's ready, resulting in his soldier getting shot in the head and dying instantly. Finn kicks Puck in the knee and gets kicked back, then they resume playing while stuffing their faces with sausages and chips, downing the Monster like it's liquid life.

 

By the time Carole gets home, the boys have already been playing Halo for six hours and it's past ten o'clock and it's really too late to get pizza, but she's hungry and they're wired on energy drinks that she swears she banned from the house, so she orders two large pizzas and they make a night of it anyway.

 

And maybe it isn't a normal family, but Finn's pretty sure Puck is a part of theirs and that's pretty cool with him. Even if it isn't normal to dream about your best friend when you have  _those_  kind of dreams, and even if it isn't normal to have your best friend poke at your belly and talk about abs that aren't even there (because Puck insists that Finn's getting abs and keeps poking to check, and it's totally not giving Finn butterflies and goose bumps. Nope. Not at all), and even if it's kind of odd to worry about sharing a bed with him when you've shared a bed for sleepovers for the last three years...

 

Finn's glad to have Puck as a best friend and a sort of brother and he's glad his mom lets him keep coming over, and he really wouldn't trade Puck for anything, even with all the not-normal parts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the feedback and encouragement! It's always greatly appreciated. :)


	3. Age 13

It’s the summer before eighth grade, and they are so going to rule the middle school this year! Finn and Puck are the coolest guys on the JV football team and Finn’s pretty sure he’s got second-string quarter-back in the bag. They’re gonna be awesome, and they get to hang out with the high school guys, and how cool is that?

 

The days are counting down to the first day of school, and Finn’s pretty sure he already has a crush on this new girl who moved into town last month and went to a pool party Santana threw last week that Puck dragged Finn to.

 

“Quinn Fabray. That’s a kinda strange name, isn’t it?” Finn asks Puck, still on the same track he’d been on for the past half hour. And Puck might point out that Finn really can’t talk when it comes to weird names, but he’s honestly so done with talking about this stupid _girl_ that he just rolls his eyes and goes back to his sharpie-drawn barbed wire around his left bicep. It’s getting hard to reach, but he’s pretty sure Finn would completely botch it, so he doesn’t ask for help.

 

Finn keeps talking, flopping back in Puck’s front yard where they’ve been sitting for almost an hour now. “I mean, she’s totally cute though, right? And she’s not like… slutty like Santana,” Puck glares at him for that, but Finn doesn’t even notice. “I mean, she’s into Jesus and stuff. She said something about making a promise to God when Brittany asked why she wasn’t wearing a bikini!”

 

Puck’s pretty sure his eyes are going to get stuck in the back of his head for how hard he’s rolling them. Seriously, he’s about ready to punch his best friend just to get the guy to shut up already. He just wants to focus on how they’re going to rock at football and how they’re going to rule the high school before they even officially get there. Yeah, that’s what eighth grade is for. Not chasing after some stupid new girl with a ‘holier than thou’ complex about her.

 

So he tells Finn so. “Why are you so obsessed with her? She isn’t even gonna put out, and it isn’t like you’re gonna date somebody from now til high school. Come on, dude!” He glares at Finn, throwing the marker aside, tattoo finished. “Shouldn’t you be looking for someone to get rid of the big V with? I mean, isn’t that what you’ve been bitching to me about?”

 

It’s weird to Finn, hearing his best friend swearing so freely, since he pretty much never swears, but at the same time it’s just a normal thing to hear from Puck. So maybe it isn’t so strange. He groans and closes his eyes, and Puck thinks that at least he got something through his friend’s thick head.

 

“I… I guess you’re right. But, like, is sex even that big of a deal? I mean… I dunno,” Finn stutters and he’s blushing, but that’s never mattered with him and Puck, so he keeps talking. “I guess I just don’t know what I’m missing so I don’t know if I’m even really missing anything?” He looks over to his best friend and sees a look of concentration that he really didn’t expect.

 

Puck rolls his eyes again and he’s seriously worried they’re going to get stuck one of these times, then he gets up and kicks Finn’s foot to get him moving as well. “C’mon. Let’s go order food and play Halo…” He’s still thinking about how to explain sex to his best friend and talking about food will definitely keep Finn distracted for a little while…

 

But even while they order way too much Chinese food and set up the Xbox, Puck’s mind is racing. How does he tell Finn that he’s missing out on a hot, warm place to bury his manhood, which in itself he barely knew existed? How can he possibly describe what a girl tastes like ‘down there’ or how it feels to be sucked off? And he can’t let Finn know how his mind sometimes wanders when a girl with short hair goes down on him… how thoughts of his best friend fill his mind more often than they should, and at the most inopportune times…

 

“I mean, it feels good. That’s… That’s the main point of sex, I guess?” Puck finally comments after his character dies for the third time in a row due to his lack of concentration. “It’s hard to explain, I guess, but, what’s the point of dating otherwise? You don’t think you’re gonna get with this new chick and like… be with her forever or something, do you?”

 

And now Puck’s looking at Finn like he’s stupid and Finn hates when people look at him that way, especially when Puck’s the one doing it, so he just grumbles a negative answer and unpauses the game to force his best friend to move on.

 

They go back to their video game for a while, but then Puck gets bored and Finn’s still a little miffed about how apparently stupid his feelings for this pretty new girl are and Puck just wants to get rid of the awkwardness. So he goes to the room that used to be his dad’s ‘den’ of sorts and he pulled a bottle from the cabinet that was locked, but that Puck has the key for.

 

“Alright, since you aren’t gonna have sex, we’re gonna do something else grown-up. This,” Puck says, brandishing a bottle of odd brown-colored liquid with a black label on it and grinning lopsided at Finn. “This is Jack, and he’s gonna be our party host tonight!”

 

Sarah’s at a friend’s house for the night, so at least they don’t have to worry about getting caught. Ruth is working a double and Carole’s at a retreat with her sister out of town and… well, it’s really the perfect time to try drinking, but Finn’s still nervous and he doesn’t know about this, but Puck’s unscrewing the cap and…

 

He passes the bottle and Finn screws up his face in concentration and takes a drag from the glass bottle, fighting the urge to spit it out when the whiskey burns his throat and make his tongue want to shrink in discomfort and distaste. Ew. Who actually _likes_ that flavor?

 

Apparently Puck does, or at least he’s pretending to, because he motions for the bottle and takes a longer pull. Then he’s passing it back to Finn, and maybe he doesn’t like it and it makes his stomach churn uncomfortably, but Finn isn’t about to look like a weak moron in front of his badass best friend. So he drinks more, and then he drinks a little more before passing it back, and he’s starting to feel fuzzy and his stomach isn’t so upset as he gets light headed and… okay. Maybe Jack isn’t such a bad party host.

 

“What’s so special about Quinn anyway?” Puck slurs, and Finn vaguely notices that they’ve drank a lot out of that bottle, but Puck’s splashing a little more into his mouth and a lot more down the front of his shirt before offering the bottle to Finn, who decides one more gulp won’t hurt, and sloshes the whiskey over his own crotch when he tries to get it into his mouth.

 

“Oops,” he mumbles, and Puck’s laughing at him. “Damn, dude, now I’m all sticky and wet and this _smells horrible_.” He sets the bottle down and doesn’t even think before unbuttoning his pants and kicking them off. Because ew. He doesn’t want to be soaking in liquor! He’s already stuck tasting it- he doesn’t want to smell it on himself all night, too.

 

Puck stops mid-screwing the cap back on the mostly-empty bottle and stares at Finn as he struggles to get his leg out of his pants without falling over, licks his lips, runs his hands through his hair that’s shaved on the sides now cause his mom wouldn’t let him get a full Mohawk but she at least let him shave the sides and that’s about halfway there… He shakes himself out of that daze and finishes putting the bottle away, then peels his own soggy shirt off and puts it with the pants.

 

He’ll figure out how to do the laundry before his ma gets home the next day- or maybe he’ll ask Sarah to do it for him and promise to take her to a movie or the mall or something if she does. Whatever doesn’t get him and Finn in trouble. For now, though, he can’t really stop staring at his best friend, who looks a little drunk and a little confused, and he should really tell Finn that he’s never drank _this much_ and he isn’t sure why he wanted to drink so much and… He really just can’t get himself to do anything but follow Finn’s lips as he tries to process the question Puck asked.

 

“She’s… I dunno. She’s pretty?” he answers dumbly, looking at Puck through glazed eyes. And Puck’s moving closer, and Finn isn’t sure what he’s supposed to do now, but he’s a little tired and a little fuzzy and he keeps looking at Puck’s lips and licking his own and Puck’s biting his lips and it’s making them get reddish and Finn really wants to taste them and where did that thought come from?

 

But then the thought of how he used to dream and Puck was in them and it always sent him over the edge and… Puck leans in and Finn gasps and their mouth press together and it’s like coming home. It’s so easy and so natural and they just can’t help but lean into it and Puck groans when Finn opens his mouth a little more so Puck can slide in his tongue. It’s sloppy and perfect and the whiskey tang just adds to the bite of the taboo that is kissing your best friend.

 

Finn doesn’t know what to do with his hands, so they just fan out at his side while Puck’s find space in Finn’s hair, on Finn’s hip, fingers digging in, bruising, tugging at him, pulling his boxer-clad crotch against him as he leans his bare torso into Finn and takes, takes, _takes_. And Finn just keeps giving. God, he can’t believe this is his first real kiss.

 

Sure, they’ve played spin the bottle at birthday parties (Santana’s) and there was a dare once (at soccer, with one of the guy’s sisters) and he’s kissed Sarah on the cheek and the forehead but… This is a real kiss, and it feels so _good_ and Finn can’t believe what he’s been missing. And he knows Puck has had many kisses. He’s had sex. He’s done it all. But this… Finn hopes it feels special to his best friend, too.

 

They pull apart and Finn’s panting to try and catch his breath, while Puck stares at him with a look in his eyes Finn doesn’t think he’s ever seen. “Puck?” he asks, voice raspy and breathless.

 

Puck blinks and nods, then swallows a few times before he speaks. “Yeah. I… This doesn’t mean I’m gay, alright? We’re not gay. We’re just…” And there aren’t really words for what they’re ‘just’ but Finn nods along quickly anyway, so Puck talks again. “But that was good, right? And… and that’s okay? And it can… happen… again?”

 

Finn doesn’t really know what more to say, so he nods vigorously and just says “yeah,” breathlessly before leaning in and kissing Puck again. He’s still gonna see about the Quinn thing, but… well, maybe he’s also looking forward to sleepovers with Puck even more now.

 

It’s probably nothing, right? Just because he used to have wet dreams about this boy and now they’re making out and Finn’s positive he’s never been so hard in his thirteen years of life… No, it’s nothing. He’s just a teenager and teenagers are always horny. That’s all it is. And Puck said they aren’t gay, so they aren’t gay. They’re just best friends sucking face. There’s nothing weird about that at all.


	4. Age 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's a little shorter, but I think it's pretty important. Hope you all enjoy. ;)

It’s the night before school starts and the boys are only at Finn’s house because Carole and Ruth had a two-day training in Columbus and they had to stay overnight. It was decided the boys could stay together and get to school okay, but Sarah would stay with a friend, so Finn and Puck are at the Hummel house, supposed to get to bed early and have a healthy breakfast before starting their sophomore year. That… yeah, that definitely isn’t going to happen.

 

They’ve already had two Monsters each and are on their third can, it’s almost 12:30 and the tournament they’d been in on Xbox Live just ended. Puck lets out a burp that has Finn grinning while grumbling out a ‘gross, dude!’ and tossing a pillow at his friend. He’s not really sure what they’re going to do now that the game is done but they’re still wired from energy drinks and adrenaline, but they usually can figure something out.

 

It’s not too surprising when Puck suggests they use Finn’s computer to find some porn. Some friends might find it weird to watch porn together, but, well, Finn and Puck have always done stuff together. They talk about the weird things and they do the weird things and they just… don’t care what other people might think about it. It’s nobody’s business but theirs. Plus, Puck knows that Quinn doesn’t put out, like, at all, and Finn is horny like, all the time, so.

 

The boys have some porn on and they're watching this cheerleader get fucked from behind while she sucks off another guy and the whole lead up involved football players and it's all very them but at the same times completely unrealistic because Sue would  _kill_  the Cheerios if they got jizz stains on their uniforms, so it kind of takes away from the movie a little. Either way, they both have their dicks out and their jerking off, but Finn's not really getting completely hard and he feels really disconnected and that's bumming Puck out, too.

 

The boy, who finally convinced his mom to let him get his head shaved to an actual Mohawk, pauses the movie and nudges Finn with his shoulder. "What's wrong, dude?" he asks and Finn just shrugs. How is he supposed to say that porn isn't  _real_  enough? How he is supposed to tell his best friend that he just wants him to touch him? That's just... awkward. But, damn, Finn really wants to tell Puck that he dreams about their cocks touching and he wonders what it would feel like to get off  _together_  instead of just with each other and... that doesn't make him gay, right?

 

Without him even having to say anything it's like Puck just knows. He leans in and grunts in Finn's ear. "Dude, we can talk about this stuff, remember? We got each other's backs. We don't say shit to anybody else, right?" They lock eyes for a moment, then Puck smirks and Finn grins and nods.

 

"Right," he breathes, and now it's easier to function. Because Puck is his  _best friend_  and he can trust him with anything and he'll always have his back. So he can talk to him about this, and it won't end up bad. It'll be okay. Because he's with Puck, and nothing ever ends up not okay when Finn's got Puck. "I just... I need to  _feel_."

 

Without any more discussion, Puck's fingers are on Finn's shaft and chills run up the quarterback's spine. He shivers and his hips jerk and he doesn't even know what to do anymore. "Oh, jeez," he mutters, and Puck laughs a little before stepping closer. The two are so close they're sharing breath, and their cocks brush together and Finn thinks he might just die. It feels so  _good_.

 

"Shit," Puck groans, then his hand is wrapped around both of them and he moves his hips again and Finn can't breathe. They're jerking together in Puck's hand and  _oh my God_  it's amazing. Who knew two cocks pressed together and rubbing could feel like this? "Feels so good."

 

Puck keeps muttering in Finn's ear and all Finn can do is shake and whimper and whine so loud and then he's coming way too soon and Puck just keeps going, going and it's too sensitive but Finn can't tell him to stop because it's so good. He can't bear the idea of Puck stopping before he comes, because Finn can't imagine not feeling both of them spread out sticky and mixed together on his stomach, so he jerks right along with Puck, and he's getting hard again and how is that even possible? And then when Puck finally explodes, Finn's balls tighten once more and he's spurting a tiny bit of come right alongside him somehow, and Finn can't even believe it's possible.

 

With another swear and a shaky laugh, Puck steps back and grabs some tissues. He hands a wad to Finn and starts wiping himself clean, then the pair look up and lock eyes.

 

"That was amazing," Finn says, face pink and ears red and not knowing if that was the right thing to say but not having any other words to fill the empty space. The thing is, it really was amazing, and he doesn't feel bad for doing it. He doesn't feel bad for feeling good with his best friend.

 

The thing is, Finn keeps thinking about what else they can do. He thinks about tasting Puck instead of letting all the come go to waste. He thinks about what Puck does with all those girls and how he kinda wishes it was him instead. Of the girls. He wants to be with Puck. And that doesn't really scare him anymore.

 

Maybe... maybe he's not so sure that he's not gay, but... no one else can know that. Because he and Puck are football stars and jocks and they simply can't be  _gay_. That just doesn't happen. The only people who are gay are... Kurt Hummel and... um, well. Kurt Hummel. And Puck tosses him in a dumpster every morning. There's no  _way_  Puck or Finn can be gay. At least not openly. Nope. They're not gay.

 

Puck looks a little awkward as he runs a hand through his Mohawk. "Uh... I think we need to... get some stuff out in the open? Set some ground rules?" he asks, and Finn nods, feeling equally awkward. They know they need this conversation, this 'confession session,' but that doesn't mean it's gonna be easy.

 

"Getting off together is awesome," Puck says, and Finn quickly agrees. "I like kissing you, too. I mean, making out and shit. That's hot. But, like, it doesn't mean anything, right? We're not gay." It's clear and easy but it leaves a bitter taste in Puck's mouth, and Finn feels his gut twist as he nods along. "We're just friends who found some stuff we both like. And nobody else needs to know. Cause they wouldn't understand. And," he looks seriously at Finn, and it makes Finn's heart stutter. "I ain't gonna share."

 

With a wide grin on his face, Finn surges forward and kisses Puck hard on the lips. The pair make out for a while, enjoying the afterglow of their post-orgasm haze until Finn pulls away to yawn. "We better get some sleep," he mumbles, and Puck nods.

 

So they aren't gay, but they can do all of that. And that's way more than Finn does with his girlfriend. But he's really not complaining, and if he doesn't have a label for it, well, that doesn't really matter, does it? After all, he's pretty sure he's going to keep experimenting with Puck and he's pretty sure they're going to do new things and he's pretty sure that's going to eventually include sucking his best friend's cock, and if he gets to do that... Well, he'll be as 'straight' as anyone.


	5. Age 16

Finn can't believe he's actually having a sleepover with Puck. He hasn't talked to his best friend in over a month now and he's still so pissed at him and he tried to punch him in the face last time they even attempted to actually speak to each other without other people around and... this isn't going to end well. But it has to end well because when he's angry with Puck he can't freaking function and it's destroying him.

 

He has to fix this because his life is going crazy and he can't stand it and he needs his best friend, dammit. So this has to work. This sleepover has to fix things, and if he asked his mom to stay at her sister's that weekend and she gave him a knowing look before agreeing and if she knows more than she lets on but isn't going to out him before he's ready to talk to her about it... Well, Finn's always known he has a really awesome mom.

 

Pacing never used to be a thing Finn did, but he's pacing now because he doesn't know what else to do and if he stops for too long he'll end up kicking a chair because  _what the hell_? He still can't believe that Puck slept with his girlfriend! Quinn was  _his_ , dammit, and everyone knew it! Puck especially knew how much Finn liked the girl and he still had to sleep with her. And not only sleep with her, but do it without protection and knock her up!

 

And didn't he even think about Finn at all? About the fact that Finn thought the two of them had something going? Never mind Quinn, what about Finn and Puck?! He was just... he was hurt and confused and he just needed answers, but to get those answers he had to remain calm.

 

The knock on the door had Finn jerking his head to stare at it in alarm. Puck didn't knock. He just opened the door and came right in like he owned the place. He hadn't knocked since they were eight years old! They were really broken right now, weren't they?

 

An overwhelming sadness fills him as Finn gets up and goes to the door, opening it for his best friend. He stares at Puck, who stares right back, and their eyes lock on mirrored despair, regret, fear, and love, and they break. Puck throws himself into Finn's arms and chokes out a sob as Finn lets the dams burst and the tears flow freely from his eyes. He curses Puck, he asks all the questions in a rush of words that no one can understand, but Puck feels them and he knows and he's sorry, he's so fucking sorry.

 

"But why were you dating her?" he asks and Finn stares at him, blinking and confused. "Why would you call her your girlfriend and say you love her if it mattered so much? If  _we_  mattered so much?" Puck demands, and Finn isn't sure he has answers.

 

Instead, the quarterback asks his own question. "Why do you screw all the Cheerios, Puck?! Why do you have sex with so many girls? Why do you act like we have nothing if it matters?" He lets out his anger with each word while Puck bites his lip, feeling small.

 

"I was scared? I... We talked about it. We need to hide. We can't be like Hummel and get dumpster tossed and slushied every day," Puck mumbles, and Finn awkwardly runs a hand through his hair.

 

That's what he thought, too, but... They can't keep hurting each other, either. "Yeah, but if I call a girl mine and you sleep with them, we're like... cheating on each other," he says, and Puck glances up with a worried look. "We might not admit it to anyone else but..."

 

They share a look and Finn's ears are red again while Puck shifts a little clumsily. Maybe they've been saying they aren't gay, but maybe it's time to admit to themselves that maybe they kind of are. Maybe.

 

"It's just... this  _hurts_ , Puck. I can't..." Finn looks around the entryway of his house, where the pair haven't moved from, and he can hardly breathe. "I can't handle it anymore. I can't pretend we don't have anything when we have  _everything_  and I can't hurt other people by pretending to love them. It's all or nothing, Puck."

 

There's conflict in Puck's eyes before he mutters 'fuck it' and surges forward, kissing Finn harder than ever. Because there's never been a question of what matters most to either boy. It's always been each other.

 

Puck's hands are in Finn's hair, tugging and tangling despite the shortness of it and Finn has his fingers bunched in the fabric of his best friend's tee. He can hold back the moans, not that he really tries. It isn't like Finn wants to hide how Puck is making him feel, after all.

 

The door is left unlocked as the pair quickly shuffle to the couch, unable to tear apart from each other long enough to make it up the stairs to Finn's room. Puck pulls Finn's shirt from his body while the quarterback tugs on his best friend's jeans, forgetting about buttons and zippers in his eagerness for skin and heat and pleasure. Puck chuckles.

 

"You're going to rip my dick off, Hudson," he grumbles, shoving Finn's hands away so he can undo his pants and properly pull them off. Of course, he isn't wearing any boxers, which explains why Finn's previous impatience could have caused injury.

 

The sight has Finn licking his lips, and, okay, so maybe he's not straight. "Shit, Puck," he groans, and the Mohawked boy smirks.

 

Finn's on his knees in no time, shirtless and drooling over his best friend's cock. He leans forward and Puck doesn't even have time to think as Finn takes him in, sucking eagerly, hunger clear in his moans and his method, or lack thereof. He might not know what the hell he's doing, but he's all in and he's nothing like the girl's Puck's been with.

 

These lips are a little chapped, the mouth is a lot bigger, and the teeth aren't afraid to graze a little, to tease, to almost hurt, but never quite be painful- just keep Puck on his toes so that he's constantly on that edge of orgasm, but not quite there. It's amazing, and Puck says so, over and over again. His fingers curl in Finn's short hair, tugging and urging him to take more, and Finn  _does_.

 

Even when he gags, Finn just pulls off a little and swallows and tries again, and Puck is absolutely amazed by him. Finn is so much better than some Cheerio. He just doesn't give up, and he isn't afraid to get messy, either. He has spit all down his chin and all over his lips and when Puck pulls him off, he just stays there and pants and looks up at Puck and opens his mouth and  _takes it_  when Puck comes all over his face and his neck and his pecs.

 

"Holy  _shit_ ," Puck grunts, and Finn just smiles at him like a puppy eager for praise. Cause he knows he did a good job, and Puck can't help but grin right back. "Holy shit..."

 

When Puck can finally breathe again, he looks down at Finn and starts to offer to help him out, but then his eyes fall on the obvious wet spot at the front of Finn's light jeans, and he grins. "You got off on that, huh?" he asks, and it doesn't sound condescending or anything. It sounds like Puck's maybe a little impressed. Maybe even happy that his pleasure can bring his best friend pleasure. So, Finn blushes and grins and nods, and Puck kisses him sloppily on the lips. "Let's get changed and talk, alright?"

 

So they change into some sweatpants and forego the shirts because who the hell wants to wear shirts when they're probably going to revisit their earlier fun later and more clothes just get in the way of things, right? Once they have a couple pizzas on the way and a bag of chips and some Coke, they settle on the couch to wait for dinner and watch some TV while they talk.

 

"So, um..." Finn starts, feeling awkward even though it's clear that they both have things to say. Obviously this matters to both of them, but there are ground rules that need followed. There's stuff they just can't handle right now, and they need to be man enough to admit that.

 

Puck clears his throat and finally just lets the words come out, sort of like a volcano erupting. Once he starts, he can't seem to stop. "Look, you matter to me, alright? All the girls, they don't mean shit. They're just... popularity boosts, I guess. I'm the sex shark, you know? I have a reputation. Just like going to Juvie and knocking Quinn up and... I dunno, shoving Hummel in the dumpster. I do shit cause I'm supposed to. And I'm not supposed to love a dude!" He used that word.  _Love_. And Finn's heart speeds up but he stays quiet cause Puck's still going. "I can't handle what the guys would do to us. I just can't. Okay? But... I can stop being with girls. We can just... spread rumors that we've been out with chicks and people will believe it. Right?"

 

Finn kind of just stares at his best friend for a while before nodding dumbly. Puck goes on. "I don't wanna fuck this up, man. I just... it means too much, okay? And it's just  _ours_ , alright? Screw everyone else. This is too important to let them tear it apart or call it gross or... I dunno. But it isn't worth letting anyone make it  _bad_ , you know?" Hearing Puck call what they have special, call it important enough to cherish and hide from the world so that it stays that way, that makes Finn's heart speed up. It makes him feel warm inside and he feels like he can't breathe right.

 

"That," Finn starts, but his throat feels all scratchy and his voice sounds like he swallowed a frog, so he takes a drink of his Coke before he tries again. "That sounds good to me."

 

It's simple, but he really doesn't feel like he needs to say anything more. He trusts Puck and Puck trusts him. That's what got them here, and so what if Puck slept with Quinn and got her pregnant? So what if Finn had that love triangle thing going on with Quinn and Rachel and made out with Santana that one time just to make Puck mad? They understand each other now, and they aren't going to hurt each other again. Because these last few months have been hell, and this last full month of not speaking, it's been the worst of Finn's life, and he's not going to go through that again.

 

"I'll do whatever it takes to keep this," Finn says, and Puck looks at him with honest eyes and they just stay like that for a good five minutes until the doorbell rings and the pizza's there. "Oh, shit. I gotta get the money."

 

So they pay for the pizza and pig out on the couch, watching some Jackass on MTV and drinking way more soda than Carole would approve of.

 

When the pizza's mostly gone and they switch from Johnny Knoxville to the Real World, the boys head upstairs and break out the Xbox. It's more of a time-killer, though, since they only play for maybe an hour before they're getting killed by zombies in Left 4 Dead, their controllers left somewhere on the bed or the floor- neither of them knows because they're too busy making out.

 

It isn't long before their sweats are tossed across the room, and Finn's glad he took Puck's advice and didn't find a pair of boxers. They move together easily, finding friction and heat and Finn bites his lip until Puck bites it for him, and they come hard together, painting their torsos creamy white and filling the room with the sound of utter bliss and... yeah, it's definitely love.

 

And even if they do hide it away from the world, Finn and Puck know what they have, and that makes it enough. At least for now, it's enough.


	6. Age 18- Summer

Of all the things Puck and Finn ever dreamed of, graduating was one of the craziest. It was one of those things that they knew would come, but at the same time they never thought they'd make it. Yet, here they are. They're graduates. Really and truly, they've graduated high school and now they have the whole world ahead of them and... damn. It's terrifying!

 

In truth, they've been through a lot to get here. Puck has a kid and Finn had more than a few mental breakdowns, not limited to going off on his step-brother involving the word 'faggy'... But they're here. They did it. It's something to celebrate. And that's what they're doing. They're celebrating.

 

Or at least, that's what they're supposed to be doing, but they're still trying to make up first because they've been fighting for a few weeks now and they hardly even have much of summer left and, well, it actually took  _Kurt_  to fix things.

 

Okay, so, what really happened was Finn was kind of an idiot and was going to join the army, then Puck was an idiot back and was going to go to LA. And of course, Kurt figured things out ages ago because, well, he's  _Kurt_. So he comforted his brother when it all went to hell and then he told Finn to get his head out of his ass and...

 

Now Finn's waiting for Puck to show up so they can actually figure it all out. He doesn't really know when he stopped going over to Puck's house, but he figures it was somewhere around when Puck's mom started dating again. That and when Sarah stopped being the cute little sister and started being the mean little girl who treated them like shit and abused the hell out of Puck. Yeah... Sarah definitely took after their father.

 

Anyway, Puck's coming over and they're opening the letters they both got from the local community college together, because they promised to wait and open them together after they decided to apply. It's gonna be together or nothing, since they obviously can't handle being apart.

 

When Finn mentioned the army, Puck punched him. Multiple times. He had two black eyes. And bruises. And Carole tried to take him to the hospital and asked if he got mugged.

 

When Puck talked about LA, Kurt had to hold Finn so he didn't knock himself out falling over sobbing. There were nights of warm milk and consoling that Finn will never admit to. It was just... ugly.

 

Finn and Puck cannot live without each other. They know this now. So they will either get into school together, or they'll just be Lima Losers forever together. Hell, Finn's pretty sure he can convince Burt to hire Puck. Maybe with some begging and influence from his step-brother, but still. He's pretty sure he can make it work.

 

The door finally slams open and Finn hears Kurt grumble at Puck. "Jesus, Noah, can you  _at least_  not put a hole in the wall with the door knob?" he lectures, before climbing the stairs to resume sorting his wardrobe. Kurt's been going through his room in preparation for his move to New York for weeks now. It seems he's determined not to let NYADA's rejection keep him down, and Finn's happy for his brother.

 

"He's like my damn mother," Puck complains, hopping onto the couch next to Finn. "Always finding something to bitch at me about." Finn can't help but laugh a little. Kurt would probably smack Puck for the comparison. Finn knows the two are pretty good friends by now, though. Even if they fight like a cat and dog.

 

It's kind of weird how okay Finn is with Kurt being home while him and Puck are doing whatever it is their bound to end up doing, but he guesses it's alright. His mom and Burt are out in D.C. for the week and it's the perfect time for their letters to have come, and he almost suspects that Kurt was hiding them until that moment, but Puck actually got his at his house and Finn doesn't think Kurt was stalking Puck's mailbox so he isn't gonna give his brother that much credit, but still. It's nice.

 

"You got your letter, right?" he asks, even though he already saw the white of the envelope sticking out of Pucks' back pocket. The other boy grumbles and pulls the somewhat-battered piece of mail out of his pants and Finn bounces in place.

 

He can see Kurt hovering on the stairs, though the smaller boy was quiet in his snooping. Really, Finn finds it sweet. His brother's been so supportive, especially of the relationship that he's been building with his best friend. Kurt's never come right out and called it what it is, but he's given all the hugs and pep talks and warm milk that Finn could ever need, and he's been patient with the quarterback. Finn owes him a lot.

 

So he smiles to himself and doesn't let Kurt know that he knows he's there. Instead, he nods and grins at Puck, preparing to open his own envelope. “Let’s do this, then.”

 

They lock eyes and then they’re tearing into the envelopes and skimming over the first paragraphs of their letters before flinging themselves into each other’s arms and jumping around like oversized children. “We’re in! We’re in! We’re actually going to college!”

 

And it isn’t exactly clear who’s even talking at what point until Kurt’s shoving them apart and pawing at the floor for their forgotten letters. “Idiots, would you please read the rest before you get too distracted? I want to know if you got your requested roommates or if I’m going to be consoling the both of you all the way from New York every night,” he says in a faux-irritated tone, but there’s a light of amused adoration in his eyes and Finn and Puck both know that he sees them both as brothers, and Kurt loves not being an only child anymore.

 

The countertenor has both letters now and he reads them, not giving anything away to the jocks who are still holding each other as close as possible while paying attention to Kurt. “Well, dude?” Finn finally asks, and Kurt shakes his head with a grin.

 

“I sincerely hope they have thick walls in your residence hall…” is all Kurt says at first, then he sets the letters on the coffee table and leans into the hug that the other two offer. “Please remember to go to class? And be good to each other, dammit.” Kurt stays for just one more hug, then says he’s off to meet Blaine for a date and an evening at the Andersons.

 

Then it’s just Finn and Puck and their future, which has just gotten infinitely brighter. “Dude, how long has your brother known?” Puck asks kind of out of nowhere as they’re making out on Finn’s bed.

 

Finn just starts laughing and leans away from Puck, thinking for a minute. “I dunno, I mean, Kurt _always_ knows things, doesn’t he? I’m pretty sure he had an idea for a long while, but he’s known for sure since the day I slammed the door in your face for talking about LA.” Puck just stares for a minute, then shrugs.

 

It’s enough for him that Kurt is okay with them. In fact, he helped them do the roommate request form early enough that it would almost certainly be approved without question. Puck’s actually kinda happy to have a pseudo-sibling who is less difficult to deal with than Sarah.

 

“Will you stop thinking about my brother and fuck me already?” Finn finally growls, bringing Puck back to the here and now. “We just got the best news, like, ever, and I’m pretty sure we made a deal about being out together at college, so…”

 

It’s true. They agreed when filling out the applications and dorm requests that they would be a real couple at college. Screw all the fears and inner demons. They were gay and it was okay and if anyone had a problem with it, they could go fuck themselves. They were going to come out to the parents before they left, then just… live. Together. In the dorms and in life in general. Why not start right now?

 

“Mmm, sounds like a great idea to me,” Puck purrs, and he rolls onto Finn, pinning him to the bed and latching onto the side of his neck, which always makes the quarterback lose control of his noises. And Puck _loves_ those noises. “I fucking love you, you know that?”

 

His words are growled whispers, but Finn hears them and he feels them and he knows them like the back of his hand. Because he’s probably the only one other than Puck’s mom who’s ever heard those three words from the boy, and he cherishes that.

 

Finn grins and groans as Puck pulls away from the mark he made on Finn’s neck. “Good thing I love you too, huh?” he asks smartly, making Puck laugh and roll his eyes before quickly stripping what’s left of their clothes.

 

They always toe that line between manly and mushy. They have an understanding- they can press it, but they don’t go too far. They don’t want to turn their time into anything _bad_ or _sad_ or just… not fun. They love each other, yes. They feel a lot, but they don’t want the emotions to take away from how _good_ everything is. It works for them. And, yeah, there are times that require the mushy stuff and the emotions clouding the high of utter happiness, but they save all that for just those times.

 

It works.

 

So, they don’t dwell on the ‘I love you’s. Instead, they let them slip in as normal as each other’s name. Because that’s how it should be anyway. That’s how normal it is to feel love for each other.

 

When Puck slides his fingers inside of him, Finn feels cared for. When the Mohawked male kisses him from mouth, over neck and chest, down to his hips, Finn feels deliciously teased in the best way. And when Puck finally pulls his fingers out, slides on a condom, and slips easily inside of Finn’s well-prepared body, Finn feels _home_.

 

They aren’t just having sex, as they writhe together on Finn’s bed. They’re making love, merging their bodies together in ecstasy as they celebrate their future. Everything is going right for once, and they aren’t afraid anymore. It’s something so beautiful and so important, and maybe other people wouldn’t celebrate with bite marks over hip bones and bruises on shoulders and ass cheeks, but that’s how things work for Finn and Puck.

 

Skin slick with sweat and sticky with semen, the boys tangle their legs together and lock eyes. They kiss, breathe, and keep kissing. It’s not clear where one mouth ends and the other begins, and it’s perfect.

 

“It’s gonna be like one long sleepover next year…” Finn comments, grinning at his best friend, his lover.

 

Puck smirks back. “Best sleep over ever,” he says.

 

Explaining things might be difficult at first, but they’ll have each other, so it won’t be too hard. Plus, they already have at least one supporter. And Burt and Carole are like, the best parents _ever_ , so they figure they’ll have them, too. Not being alone makes the fear a little easier to deal with. At least, that’s what Finn things as he falls asleep in his boyfriend’s arms.


	7. Age 18- Fall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is really just a short little wrap-up to the story. I hope you've enjoyed it and that this chapter kind of gives the story closure. Thank you so much for all the feedback and kudos. (I might un-anon... not sure yet... XD We'll see!)

Finn’s on his back and Puck is driving into him with so much force that he can’t help but hit his prostate every, freaking, time. And oh, _God_ , it feels incredible. And Finn can hardly keep from screaming with every thrust, but he holds back and grunts as he bites his lip. He moans and fists the sheets in one hand, Puck’s shoulder in the other. He’s leaving bruises, but neither boy cares. They don’t have to worry about anything anymore. They don’t have to hide it.

 

A few months ago, they came out. To everyone. First, they told Kurt, even though he already knew. It was for formality’s sake, and the countertenor appreciated it even if he laughed at them and said they sucked at keeping secrets. He hugged them and supported them and it was _great_. That was the best coming out experience the couple had.

 

They’d told Burt and Carole when they got back from D.C., and even though they were confused, they weren’t mean or negative. They just… weren’t as excited as Kurt. And they weren’t so supportive of the shared dorm knowing what a distraction the pair might be to each other.

 

Obviously, the shared dorm stayed, since it was the middle of the day and both boys were thankfully free from class at the moment and they didn’t have some weird roommate to deal with. No, there was no one but Finn and Puck, and nothing to do but whatever they wanted. And right now that was Puck fucking into Finn in the _exact right place_ that had Finn whimpering like a baby in his boyfriend’s arms.

 

Puck smirked and leaned down, biting Finn’s collar bone and sucking to make a deep bruise as he rocked his hips just so. Finn opened his mouth in a silent scream and came hard between them, clenching hard around Puck’s straining shaft.

 

When they’d told Ruth, she’d been upset for at least a week, talking about religion and grandbabies. Then she spoke with Carole and eventually came around. Sarah, well, she wasn’t speaking to her brother, though she really didn’t speak to him before either.

 

Their friends were a mixed reaction, but it really didn’t matter much since pretty much everyone was parting ways. Nobody said anything openly hateful because they’d all at least faked being open minded for Kurt, Blaine, Santana, and Brittany. So, they couldn’t say anything too mean and if they didn’t have anything nice to say, well, they just stayed quiet.

 

It was all a lot less eventful than the boys expected. Well, the outing was. The actual being openly together was… that was fantastic.

 

“Fuck, Finn,” Puck groaned, jerking his hips for a few hard thrusts before he came in the condom deep inside his boyfriend. “Damn, I don’t wanna go to class after _that_ ,” he grumped, and Finn laughed.

 

This is a typical day for them now. It’s kind of weird how easily the pair have gotten used to life on campus, and together. They walk each other to class holding hands. Finn plays football since his quarterback skills were noticed here, but Puck decided to leave that behind. He still goes to every game and cheers his boyfriend on. They make out in the locker room sometimes after practice.

 

And they’ve skipped a few classes to have sex, too. But Finn doesn’t want them to fail, and he knows Kurt and Carole would both murder the both of them, so he shoves Puck off the bed and gets himself up as well.

 

“Come on, shower time and then class. We’ve got tonight for more. And tomorrow night, and the night after…” he trails, helping Puck from the floor and pulling him into a quick kiss. “Remember? We’re on a never ending sleepover. No worries or cares, babe. Just us and everything the night can give us.”

 

Puck grins and they head to their bathroom together.

 

Sure, life isn’t perfect. Not everyone’s happy or satisfied with their choices, and Puck really doesn’t get why the hell he has to take this political science class that just stopped him from working Finn up to a round two, but… He’s having a life-long sleepover with his best friend and lover. He’s with the man he loves every day, and he knows that same man loves him back.

 

They survived against the odds, and, damn. That has to be worth something. So maybe there are always things that could be better, but shit. There’s a lot that could be a lot worse. So Puck will take what he has and run with it.

 

And, getting to his knees as the hot water rolls down his back, he thinks he’ll take a quickie in the shower, too.


End file.
